Don't ignore this one critical thing in your life

I’m going to hot tub with a bunch of my women friends tonight under the full moon. It’s part of my on-going birthday week celebration. Last night was Indian dinner with one group of friends and tonight I’ll join my women in the hot tub and we’ll marvel at the moon and the life that brings us together.

My kids and I will have a different kind of celebration this weekend together: it’s always important to my youngest that we actually sing Happy Birthday.

One of the things that I’m so grateful for in my growing up is that my mother taught me how to make days count. Especially important days.

I remember her and my aunt Cheryl transforming our basement into a haunted house for Halloween, complete with smoke from dry ice and peeled grapes for the dead guy’s eyes. Once, we all dressed in period costumes, blindfolded my sister, and brought her to an alcove overlooking a gorgeous fountain in one of St. Paul’s most beautiful places, Como Park. We had an elaborate brunch waiting. Another time, I remember a detailed, across-town treasure hunt that my mom sent the kids on, hunting for treasure.

Creating a ritual around a day or an event impresses that event in our minds and hearts and becomes part of the story of our lives. And although we are the writers of our own life stories, sometimes we don’t know how to devise great story lines.

 This telling of a great story…a living of a great life, is part and parcel of Tending the Fire Within. I love to plan a party or an event and I love to tell the story. They go hand in hand.

So what does it take to make a great life? A great story? A few things seem clear.

Our people. I’m not saying we have to have a gazillion friends. For some people, their “tribe” is their best friend. Or their family. Everyone does this her own way. I love so many people I just can’t keep up with them all. But however we do it, we gotta have our people and they have to have us. We need each other.

Time together. I know that quality time is important is key (I’m talking about some quality time right here, right?) but we really need the quantity, too. We have to make the time to have these things happen in our lives.

But the biggest thing that we’re losing our historical cultural memory on and more people find tricky?

Ritual. We need some way to mark important moments, some way to mark our community’s connection, so way to say: Hey, I belong to you and you belong to me and isn’t that the coolest thing?

Ritual is the linchpin of a great life. Think about it: going to the lake cabin every summer, eating that nasty lutefisk every single Christmas Eve, flying a kite on the first days of spring, hunting for Easter eggs. Our stories become our lives and our lives become our stories.

We’d best make sure we’re telling good stories.  

Tending the Fire Within lives and breathes for this kind of thing. We’re damn good at it, if we do say so ourselves. If you’re finding that your group needs a little cohesive action and you don’t know how to find it, I hope you give us a call and let us help.

And keep an eye open. Because I’m about to launch some online offerings that will bring some of these ideas right to you. Right there, with you. Just where I like to be.

               

Let me know what kinds of things that you do with your people to make life hum along. I’d love to hear your ideas.  Just leave a note in the comments below. I’ll think about you in the hot tub tonight.